The Real Reason You Don't Achieve Your Goals (pt.1)

coaching energy healing goals new years resolutions personal development psychology results coaching smart goals trapped emotions Dec 22, 2019

It’s the time of year when people are reflecting on the previous year and thinking about what they’d like to accomplish in the following year.

Often usually boiling down to something to do with our body, money, relationships and time…our “goals” or resolutions are something like:

This year I will...

  • Get in shape
  • Earn more money
  • Be more present with family/friends
  • Work less, play more

So we set out to figure out HOW to do this. Most articles you read will say if you just...

  • Set a goal
  • Make a plan that’s SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, timeline)
  • Schedule it
  • Stick to the plan

then you will reach your goal.

But….that doesn’t always happen…and, if it does, there’s often something that feels missing once it’s achieved and people are left feeling disappointed.

For many, the list tends to be similar to the previous years and are scratching their head thinking “I don’t know why I can’t ______________”.

Two Things That Prevent Our Success
2 things prevent us from the success we desire that I’ll break down into 2 posts ~ I’ll dive into the biggest reason in this post and share the second next week.

The first and BIGGEST reason that you don’t accomplish your goal is that you are not in alignment with it.

While it’s important to talk about the HOW to achieve a goal rarely do you hear anyone talking about what REALLY prevents us from experiencing success.

When we do that, we switch the focus from “How do I ______?” to “Who do I need to be to ______”

Sure, you say that you want it, but when you dig down deep, you are actually doing everything you can to sabotage yourself from receiving it.

You may say that you want XYZ but subconsciously you don’t believe that 

  • You are worthy of it
  • You are deserving of it
  • It is safe to experience it
  • You are good enough to receive it

You don’t believe that you could be that person who is experiencing whatever it is that you desire.

Here are a few examples:

No one in Mary's family was college-educated. She wanted to go to college but she was afraid that if she went to college she would lose the connection with her family because they would think she was better than them and she didn’t believe that she was worthy of going since no one else in her family did ~ so, it wasn’t safe for her to accomplish her goal nor did she believe she was worthy of going to college.


Sam said year after year that he was going to earn more than $100K a year as a musician. Each year he never quite made it. During Sam’s childhood, his dad told him that he could never earn a living off of being a musician because he wasn’t good enough ~ Sam put “earn $100K +” as a resolution each year but he also kept telling himself year after that the wasn’t good enough to do it.


Beth had struggled with carrying around excess weight most of her adult life. Each year she resolved to “lose” it but each year she either stayed the same or gained more. Beth had experienced a trauma in her teens; as a result of that trauma, Beth told her self that she didn’t deserve to have the body she desired AND that if she did she would get hurt again.


It’s never that you didn’t work hard enough to accomplish your goals, 99.9% of the time, it’s because your subconscious is not aligned with the belief that you can actually BE that person.

To actually have the experiences, you desire you have to BECOME that person; you have to change your identity…which is scary for most people because that’s different than who they have been their whole lives.

We have to release old beliefs, stories, trapped emotions and trauma that are keeping us in our old identity so that we are aligned with the vision of who we want to be.

On this week’s energy-releasing event, I’ll check to see how aligned you are with one of your New Years' desires and release some emotions and trauma so that you can be fully aligned to experience it.

At 8 pm EST on Zoom or streaming on my personal FB page (if the technology gods allow it) I’ll do my best to work with as many people as possible to release trapped emotions so that you can be 100% aligned with your desires.

Please join us on Zoom or here on my personal FB page.

Can’t Make the Call?

No worries ~ if this is before 8 pm EST on Monday, December 23rd, shoot me an email ([email protected]) with your first/last name, age and a specific desire you have for the year.

Make sure that it is very specific ~ meaning, “I will earn $150K this year” vs. “I want to earn more money” or “I will release 15 lbs” vs. “I want to lose weight” ~ we’ll release more if you are very specific about what it is you desire.

If I can get to you on the call, I’ll do the work then I’ll email you with what was released.

If this is after that time, here’s a link to my calendar to set up a time to talk about how we can work together to get you in alignment:


Get Clarity
What are some of the stories and beliefs that you have that are preventing you from having the body and life you love?

I invite you to take a few minutes to write them down ~ then ask yourself, “is it really true that….?”

Then ask:
Who am I with this limitation?
What am I missing out on because of it?
If I didn’t have this limitation, who would I be?

I know it may feel scary at first but the more that we can look at these stories and beliefs in the eye, the less power they will have over us.

I’d love to hear from you ~ was there a time in your life when you shifted your identity to become someone different than who you were previously?

What beliefs did you release so that you could become that person?

Next week I'll share the second biggest reason that people don't accomplish their goals...until then, have fun exploring your stories about who you are!